I bumped into an old client recently who reminded me of a coaching session we had together some time ago. During our session he had what we often relate to as a ‘light bulb’ or ‘aha’ moment – a point in time when the world view shifts, something hidden was revealed and suddenly all became clear; and from which point onwards he was able to move forwards in a way that made complete sense to him.

These ‘a-ha moments’ can make a huge difference for coachees and much has been written about whether coaches should set achieving these transformational moments in time as a specific objective.

However, it’s not that simple! In a learned article by Sophie Austin published in Coaching at Work Vol 12, issue 1, page 26, Sophie guards against making ‘a-ha moments’ an objective in itself. She also states that ‘it’s what the coachee does with this ‘a-ha insight’ that matters’. And I’d agree.

Giving ‘a-ha moments a helping hand’

It’s not possible to force an ‘a-ha moment’ like the one that my client experienced. You can however facilitate an environment in which it is more likely to happen.

Sophie’s article quotes De Vita (2003) who describes the ‘a-ha’ moment as a ‘feeble thought, one easily overwhelmed by stronger thought traffic’. If we can create a quiet, calm and reflective space, this is often when more insightful thoughts can emerge from the subconscious to the conscious. When they do, it can be a powerful, pivotal moment.

Sophie’s article lists 10 ways in which we can increase the likelihood of facilitating an ‘a-ha moment’, reminders that also serve to facilitate positive and productive coaching sessions in a broader sense:

1. Focusing on building the relationship
2. Offering reflective space
3. Encouraging the client to ‘unfocus’
4. Considering your questioning
5. Using all the senses when coaching
6. Listening, watching for contradiction, what isn’t said, chaos in thinking
7. Challenging the client to step out of the comfort zone
8. Using metaphors or story telling to make a point
9. Being happy
10. Drawing on tools associated with opening up the creative thinking process

Coaching through the ‘a-ha moment’

As a coach, I have witnessed many such moments and sometimes they may happen for my clients without me taking particular notice. It may only have been a ‘flicker’ not a ‘lightning bolt’, and only later may they mention a particular point, thought or notion that really made a difference for them.

When I notice the ‘light bulb’ light up, I’ll stay quiet, allowing that thought to truly emerge, for my client to experience how it feels and live it through their emotions so that it is allowed to grow and develop true meaning to them.

Whilst remaining quiet I’ll think more of it as a hypothesis, that there might be something there which I should pursue in my questions, or shall share later with the coachee in a way that is helpful for their learning.

In the case of the client I bumped into recently, it was actually rather a risky comment on my part that made a huge difference, unlocking a new way of thinking for him that opened up a new path.

From disgruntled to contented director – a transformational moment

This client was a senior board director who had applied for the role of CEO in a large company. He didn’t get the job. It went to an external applicant!

My assignment was to help him figure out what to do next. During an early conversation he was describing his ambitions and dream job. However I started to feel bored, which is highly unusual for me during coaching conversations! It was also unusual since the director was usually very engaging and interesting.

So, I decided (maybe a bit fool heartedly), to share my feeling of being ‘bored’. The director was taken aback, literally. He leaned back in his chair and was silent for a while. He then said: “You know what: So, am I!”

After a little pause, he continued: “I think for my whole career, I have been telling a story of always aspiring for the next more senior role, never quite satisfied with the role I have. However, I love the ‘technical director’ role I have now. We are pushing boundaries in what and how we do it. I’m a recognised authority in my field. I get invited to speak at conferences around the world. If I took a CEO role, I would have to let go of all of this and become ‘just’ a general manager.”

It is notable that his ‘a-ha moment’ happened during a period of silence, when we’d paused and he was given the space to think and reflect on my rather provocative statement.

Years later, he still tells me, that this was a big, big ‘a-ha moment’ for him. He started to enjoy and appreciate what he had. And rather than leaving the company, which was his original intent when we started the coaching, he stayed in the role until his retirement.

Coaching can achieve great things. It can enable a breakthrough, a point in time when everything changes and is truly transformational. These are memorable moments and it’s not surprising to hear stories of such key moments from clients, even though they may have happened many years ago.